Thank you for sharing about comments regarding knitting around others. I’ve come to realize that people often don’t know how to start a conversation, so something that draws attention gives them an easy place to start. Often first comments can be awkward. I find it helpful to turn it back to the other person with a question or two — oh, do you knit too? Do you do a different kind of art? What do you do to relax your mind— gardening for example? The other thing I do is have a project that moves along easily without a lot of concentration and will say something like, this is a simple project; I like to keep my hands busy. Then I ask them a question. It doesn’t always work though - your doing something productive reminds them that they are not being productive. As odd as it sounds to us, this could feel confrontational to someone who is feeling guilty for just chatting with friends. 😧
I completely understand your discomfort pulling out your knitting in a group of non-knitters. Just remember, you don't need to justify or explain yourself, but it is polite to answer questions.
How can you talk while you're knitting? The two activities occupy different parts of your brain, and your hands know what they are doing.
You're not bored—knitting helps focus your attention, like doodling during a meeting.
You're not annoyed—if you were annoyed, you'd make some excuse and leave. Knitting is just what you do.
We normalize knitting in public by knitting in public, without fuss or fanfare. Think of it as an educational activity, not something you need to apologize or make excuses for.
I am keeping a screenshot of this in my phone as a reminder for myself. This is a beautiful reframe that I need to process for a while. Thank you so much, Sandi.
But people are not like this only around knitting. Whatever you do in public like reading also invites comments. I feel if you read or knit/ crochet/ embroider in a doc’s office it definitely reduces the stress of whatever the doc would say after seeing your reports. Also, you would feel slightly calmer if there is a delay.
But then those without hobbies will say the darnedest things😂.
I certainly have been "accused" of reading while waiting to pick up kids. :)) And I completely agree with what you say about waiting in doctors' office and hobbies. We NEED our hobbies in those moments.
I think there may be a book on how knitting is seen/felt by humans. There certainly are some who are 'closet knitters' for concern of what others might say about them. Perhaps that is why I enjoy Joyce Vance's pics of her chickens and knitting! As a retired U.S. attorney for the Northern District of Alabama, she knows this gets under some people's skin. But, when you see the number of people who thank her for sharing her pics at this time when we need a little comfort, you can see that she knows it is OKAY to knit!!!! Perhaps we need t-shirts that say, IT IS OKAY TO KNIT! :-)
Closet knitters sounds so sad even though I totally get it. I have only seen Joyce Vance's posts here and there on threads, completely missing that there was some knitting as well. Found her substack and following now. :) Thank you!
Omg, I love your slogan. It should totally be on a t-shirt and elsewhere where it can be seen by more people.
I can imagine a son or daughter of one of the mom's who confronted you at the potluck becoming a 'closet knitter.' Imagine the comments if he/she even looks at a knitting book or magazine. We humans have at times out-lawed dancing, music, card playing and reading and god only knows what else. So, it might be a good idea to hold our knitting proudly! And say a few words about what is so very good about knitting, if given the chance to speak about why we like it. If nothing else tell them to Google the history of knitting.
With the coming scarcity of things like natural fiber yarns and high end clothing made of them, those of us with endless stashes may be laughing up our sleeves when we hear the whining! :-)
You are right! My heart always goes out to the kids. If only...if only we let them be.!
"We humans have at times out-lawed dancing, music, card playing and reading and god only knows what else." - I think I am going to sit with this for a while.
Thank you for your wise and kind words as always Sandy! As for stash keeping, I am not big at it so far but I'm working on it in anticipation of any sudden scarcity. For example, when I saw some beautiful sparkle yarn (handpainted cotton+lurex blend) at my LYS last week, I jumped at it and scored a couple skeins to crochet a top for my daughter who would love it! :)
Funny, I have just this afternoon been thinking of finding a pattern and some 'fun yarn' to make a cardigan for my 2nd grader grand niece. Is there comfort in this? You bet!!
Thank you for sharing about comments regarding knitting around others. I’ve come to realize that people often don’t know how to start a conversation, so something that draws attention gives them an easy place to start. Often first comments can be awkward. I find it helpful to turn it back to the other person with a question or two — oh, do you knit too? Do you do a different kind of art? What do you do to relax your mind— gardening for example? The other thing I do is have a project that moves along easily without a lot of concentration and will say something like, this is a simple project; I like to keep my hands busy. Then I ask them a question. It doesn’t always work though - your doing something productive reminds them that they are not being productive. As odd as it sounds to us, this could feel confrontational to someone who is feeling guilty for just chatting with friends. 😧
Thank you for sharing! I enjoy your posts!
These are so helpful, thank you! Especially asking a gentle question about them. You are right about it not always working but totally worth a try.
I like how you said "it could feel confrontational" - just bearing that it mind next time I bring out a project might make a difference. :)
I completely understand your discomfort pulling out your knitting in a group of non-knitters. Just remember, you don't need to justify or explain yourself, but it is polite to answer questions.
How can you talk while you're knitting? The two activities occupy different parts of your brain, and your hands know what they are doing.
You're not bored—knitting helps focus your attention, like doodling during a meeting.
You're not annoyed—if you were annoyed, you'd make some excuse and leave. Knitting is just what you do.
We normalize knitting in public by knitting in public, without fuss or fanfare. Think of it as an educational activity, not something you need to apologize or make excuses for.
I am keeping a screenshot of this in my phone as a reminder for myself. This is a beautiful reframe that I need to process for a while. Thank you so much, Sandi.
But people are not like this only around knitting. Whatever you do in public like reading also invites comments. I feel if you read or knit/ crochet/ embroider in a doc’s office it definitely reduces the stress of whatever the doc would say after seeing your reports. Also, you would feel slightly calmer if there is a delay.
But then those without hobbies will say the darnedest things😂.
Lol! Love the last line. 😂
I certainly have been "accused" of reading while waiting to pick up kids. :)) And I completely agree with what you say about waiting in doctors' office and hobbies. We NEED our hobbies in those moments.
I think there may be a book on how knitting is seen/felt by humans. There certainly are some who are 'closet knitters' for concern of what others might say about them. Perhaps that is why I enjoy Joyce Vance's pics of her chickens and knitting! As a retired U.S. attorney for the Northern District of Alabama, she knows this gets under some people's skin. But, when you see the number of people who thank her for sharing her pics at this time when we need a little comfort, you can see that she knows it is OKAY to knit!!!! Perhaps we need t-shirts that say, IT IS OKAY TO KNIT! :-)
Closet knitters sounds so sad even though I totally get it. I have only seen Joyce Vance's posts here and there on threads, completely missing that there was some knitting as well. Found her substack and following now. :) Thank you!
Omg, I love your slogan. It should totally be on a t-shirt and elsewhere where it can be seen by more people.
I can imagine a son or daughter of one of the mom's who confronted you at the potluck becoming a 'closet knitter.' Imagine the comments if he/she even looks at a knitting book or magazine. We humans have at times out-lawed dancing, music, card playing and reading and god only knows what else. So, it might be a good idea to hold our knitting proudly! And say a few words about what is so very good about knitting, if given the chance to speak about why we like it. If nothing else tell them to Google the history of knitting.
With the coming scarcity of things like natural fiber yarns and high end clothing made of them, those of us with endless stashes may be laughing up our sleeves when we hear the whining! :-)
Aw! 2nd graders are the sweetest kind to make for! 😍
You are right! My heart always goes out to the kids. If only...if only we let them be.!
"We humans have at times out-lawed dancing, music, card playing and reading and god only knows what else." - I think I am going to sit with this for a while.
Thank you for your wise and kind words as always Sandy! As for stash keeping, I am not big at it so far but I'm working on it in anticipation of any sudden scarcity. For example, when I saw some beautiful sparkle yarn (handpainted cotton+lurex blend) at my LYS last week, I jumped at it and scored a couple skeins to crochet a top for my daughter who would love it! :)
Funny, I have just this afternoon been thinking of finding a pattern and some 'fun yarn' to make a cardigan for my 2nd grader grand niece. Is there comfort in this? You bet!!